I don’t "call in favors"

Someone asked me today if, “since I know someone that could help them” if I would “call in a favor”.


I don’t “call in favors”.  Not from friends – or business associates.

Nobody I deal with on either a personal or professional level owes me anything.  If I am dealing with someone on a personal level, then I consider them a friend.  I might discuss something with them – even try to excite them about something – but never, ever call in a favor.  That implies a previous debt.  Friendship is not a debt.

People I deal with on a professional level are either paying me, or getting paid by me – again – we are “even”.  No debts to be called in.  No room to ask for favors.

I will, of course, hook people up when I think it is good for both parties.  But if everyone wins, I am not calling in favors.

Please don’t ask me to call in any favors – nobody owes me anything,  I have friends that are friends because they are decent and honorable people that respect me and what I do.  I have business associates that I work hard for – and that work hard for me.  In either case we compensate each other based upon agreed terms.

And don’t get mad at me if I won’t introduce you to “XYZ”.  Chances are you misunderstand my relationship with XYZ to start with.

And even if you didn’t misunderstand my relationship with XYZ, I am not willing to jeopardize my relationship with XYZ.

Almost anyone is accessible in some form or fashion nowadays.  You want to meet them – go hang where they hang.  Get interested in what they are interested in.  Become a part of their outer circle.  Earn some trust.  Be nice.  Play fair.  Treat people well.  Keep your expectations low.  Everyone is busy – it may take a year or two before you get a voice in their circle.  But most people are decent people – and if they come to realize that you are interested in them, and what they are doing, instead of what they can do for you – well then you may make a friend.  And friends are far more useful in business than contacts are.

Then you won’t need me to call in any favors.  And we will all be happier.