Personal Relationships: Stop naggers in their tracks – Lifehacker

I love the fact that some people are so quick to hate! I left a comment (below) on the Lifehacker site – a comment to an article that asks how to get rid of naggers.  Here’s the initial Lifehacker question: 

Wouldn’t you like to stop being nagged? Wouldn’t you? I’m talking to you. Are you listening to me? Are you?

And here’s the rest of the post:

Well, the Happiness Project has written up a great article that helps you stop a persistent nagger in his or her tracks. Suggestions include committing to a firm deadlines, asking to be reminded only in writing, or just plain out tell the nagger that you’re a big boy/girl and you’ll get to it when you get to it. Not sure I agree with that last one, but I’d love to hear how you’ve dealt with naggers in your life – please share in the comments.

If you’re tired of being nagged all the time, here are 8 tips to STOP the NAGGING. [The Happiness Project]

So I left the following comment:

It is a very simple seven step process:

1) D

2) I

3) V

4) O

5) R

6) C

7) E

It worked wonderfully for me. Your mileage may very. Offer void where prohibited.


I was, of course, trying to be funny.  Although I did get divorced 6 years ago or so, being nagged really had nothing to do with it.  But I did receive the following email just minutes after I left my comment:

People like you cause the divorce rate to be so high.  Maybe if you would have just taken out the trash and emptied the dishwasher WITHOUT being asked, you wouldn’t have felt nagged.

You will also go to hell not just for getting divorced, but for promoting it.

And *I do not feel sorry for you*

Wow.  That was harsh.  I could have responded with something like, “Thanks, but I got divorced because prior to my divorce I WAS in hell!”

But I didn’t.  I didn’t reply at all.  And I won’t.

It’s interesting that I am suddenly the cause for divorce in America, AND that I am going to hell for it!

Ah well.  I guess my Sunday wasn’t totally wasted.  I managed to piss off some fruit-loop.

How about you – if you came here from that Lifehacker post, did you think it was at least a little funny – or did you label me as the devil?




Personal Relationships: Stop naggers in their tracks – Lifehacker


  1. >>hey, that’s what teenagers are for!

    Sigh. I thought this comment thread was goanna get quiet soon 😉

    I am a teenager, and probably I might just as well boycott commenting till this issue of teenagers being there only for taking out the trash and doing the dishes are for.

    (That was a lame joke after a lame day at school. Would somebody please laugh?)

  2. 🙂 Maryam, thanks!

    It’s funny that I still don’t have a wife, and STILL don’t do dishes or take out the trash (hey, that’s what teenagers are for!)

    But I DO do all of the shopoing, pay all the bills, mow the yard, fix crap that breaks, etc.

    I guess now I am just nagging myself!

    But I DO get to choose what to watch on TV now – so life is good 😆

    But now you have Patrick there for the summer! Yea! Life is good – make the “little Scoble” earn his keep (until Scoble 2.0 can take over).

    And look at it this way – Robert was “Scoble Alpha” where you really can’t expect anything to work well. Patrick was the Scoble Release (beta) – now you have the third generation which (with your influence) should be just about perfect!

    Life is good!


  3. Rob,

    I totally laughed when I read your comment, but I also laughed when I read the email sent to you. Robert claims that I am constantly nagging him and guess what I gently try to remind him now and then? Take out the trash; help around the house; and somesuch things 🙂

  4. P.S: I do believe in hell. I hope to be there one day before I die, while it is frozen over 😉

    It even has a wikipedia article about it!

  5. “I don’t think you can apply any “in general” rules to divorce.”

    If there is one thing life has tried in vain to teach me (and that goddamn knowledge hoarder hasn’t taught me a lot yet), it is that there are no “in general” rules at all. You cannot apply any “in general” rules to, well, anything more complex than an electron, and that too will behave very differently if you place a bunch of protons near it. We humans are a lot more complex than an electron!

  6. @Paul – that was basically my thought when I decided not to reply to them. I had nothing to gain from making a reply – and nothing to offer the person that wrote the email.

    They had a bad day, maybe. I had a good day, and was having some fun.

    I win!


  7. Rob,

    I really think you should ignore that ‘you’ll go to hell’ comment.
    Of course… you WILL… but so will I.. and you and I are going to have a PARTY there! Going to kick ass.. Get the place going!
    MAN, those holy folks and that boring heaven are going to be jealous!

    But anyway .. the real reason you should ignore it… there is not A THING you can say … and SOMEONE on this planet is offended by it and orders you to hell…

    (One has to wonder… how someone who wishes someone else to eternal and unspeakable painful torture .. can go to heaven….)

  8. But I was named for the reasons in comment 12. Not that my parents wanted me to assist a fugitive, however patriotic, without any apprehensions or to be an editor. And that family friend is way younger so it was an original name by my parents, I guess.

  9. I suppose that means you appreciate the meaning of my name, one among many. Thanks a lot! Actually, even people here also have names that are very common and are named after somebody or the other, though these names also, like yours, have some deep lineage and meaning, which are generally obvious. Mine is a standout even in my society. I have known less than 5 people with my first name so far and this includes searching through history textbooks and everything else. One was the Subhash Chandra Bose’s cousin, who drove him from then Calcutta to Afghanistan to escape the British when he was under house arrest. I saw that very car when I was in Kolkata. It’s still in the same house from where Bose escaped. One more was the founder-editor of the Anand Bazar Patrika, a pre-freedom newspaper/journal. Another is a family friend! I don’t remember the others, though I hope there aren’t too many: how many people have the first name Mohandas(Karamchand Gandhi) or Jawaharlal(Nehru)? I hope I’ll end up in that league.

  10. Sisir – just a typo 🙂 I would fix it, but it would make your comment 11 look silly, so I won’t 🙂

    My name doesn’t mean anything – except I was named ofter Robert Kennedy.

    I love how other cultures have names that have more meaning than many of ours (our Native American’s (or American Indian’s)) also have very descriptve names.

    And yes – before someone corrects me I DO realize that many of our names have a very deep lineage, and actually DO have some meaning. But they just aren’t that unique anymore 🙂


  11. And yes, I forgot to mark the end of the quote I ended comment 9 with. What funny errors one makes while typing so much in so little time…

  12. Sisir means the dew drops on the leaves early in the morning. It also means the winter season.

  13. And Rob, my name’s Sisir not Sisar(in comment 4). And don’t worry, you’re not the first one to misspell it! 😉

  14. Thank God the conversation’s cooled down! Good for you all, you’re all happy! And I agree with you on this one:”I don’t think you can apply any “in general” rules to divorce. It’s diferent for everyone. And for everyone’s kids.” Well, as a matter of fact, our talks are ranging across two very very different cultures and societies, so there definitely are some contortions in the definitions of marriage and divorce of one with respect to the other. These differences collude in your statement above, that’s the one thing common to both. Anyway, the guy or girl who made that comment:”Didn’t you break my fingers typing all this, you fellow!

  15. I’m not getting on you! 😀

    I am trying to give the Lifehacker crowd some entertainment for their brief visit here – AND educate you a little about how our society here differs on this issue.

    First, I can’t imagine staying together from the age of 39 (when I got divorced) to what, maybe 80? just because “once we were happy”. Hell no! I want out!

    And yes – my kids have two happy parents — BECAUSE we are divorced 😉 My ex comes over often. Yesterday, and the day before she was here. Today she will be here aain. We are friends. That makes my kids EXTREMELY lucky – because they do have parents that still speak, and still even can have an engaging conversation.

    I don’t think you can apply any “in general” rules to divorce. It’s diferent for everyone. And for everyone’s kids.


  16. This sure seems to be that one kind of post where the comments that follow obviously outweigh the post itself. 🙂

  17. Hey Rob, don’t get onto me like that! 😉 I’m talking about divorce in general not about you. And I hope I don’t get divorced! And even I hope that your kids are happy! I just meant that in a general sense like how much percent of divorced kids are happy…the sort of stuff that appears in magazines.

  18. Divorce is a double edged sword. Better to avoid it altogether. Also, no offence meant, but just see this:
    “I don’t have time for crazy in my life. That is why I got divorced in the first place.”
    And this,
    “I got divorced after 18 years of marriage – and it wasn’t my idea – I didn’t want it (at the time).”
    If someone became crazy after 18 years, in India, people would give importance to those 18 years rather than those few moments of craziness and decide to move on together since only so many years were left in one’s life and it’s so much important for the family. But after a while, when life becomes more aggressive, people think that their partner is coming in the way of their success and separate. This attitude must not creep into any society. I know what it means to have two happy parents. I hope everyone does. I’m not talking about this one incident, because I would side with you anyway, at least regarding the ‘hell’ issue: I admit the other guy was out of control, but for the general public on a general topic, this would be my advice.

  19. Sisar – Moral Ground? Who’s morals? Yours, mine, or theirs? We are all different. Our cultures (even if they were from the US, which I don’t know) are also different.

    Our parents, belief systems, code of ethics – they are ALL different.

    And you can ask my kids right here on this blog – ask them if they wish I was still married to their mother. They do NOT.

    In fact, when she got divorced for the second time, one of the concerns my kids had was that we WOULD get back together. We just aren’t good together anymore. Once we were. And my kids understand this – they are not young – at 18 and 16 they pretty much can think for themselves.

    Sure – I feel very bad for anyone in a divorce. It sucks it didn’t work. And I don’t care why it didn’t work.

    But I MIGHT have caused one divorce in my life – my own. I won’t apologize for others getting divorced – not will I accept responsibility for their divorce. THAT is just crazy.

    And if you ever get divorced, I will NOT go to hell over it.


  20. Sisir –

    I honestly appreciate your well-thought out, and obvious heartfelt comment.

    53% of American marriages end in divorce. We are used to it. We shouldn’t be, but we are.

    You make a good point though about this person who might just have gotten divorced recently. They might take it personally. They probably wouldn’t think it was funny.

    But telling me I am going to hell for my comment? Sorry – that is just CRAZY. Telling me I am the cause for so many divorces – that is just CRAZY.

    I got divorced after 18 years of marriage – and it wasn’t my idea – I didn’t want it (at the time).

    But the fact I got divorced then, even though it was painful for me at the time, yet I can joke about it now should be a lesson to anyone going through that pain – life gets better.

    And no – I’ll never apologize to someone that wishes for me to be in hell. I don’t even believe in hell and the fact they desire me to be there is annoying! 😐 Imagine if I DID believe in hell.

    In any case, I don’t think I should apologize to them just to “make them feel better”. Haters hate – so my apology wouldn’t mean anything anyway, I don’t think.

    I DO think they should apologize to ME though – because I know for a fact that *I* had nothing to do with whatever their personal situation or mental state is. I don’t know them.

    And hope I never meet them.

    I don’t have time for crazy in my life. That is why I got divorced in the first place.

  21. I think that it’s always better to be on moral high ground, which you in the present case aren’t. Also, I think this could induce further such comments : “Ah well. I guess my Sunday wasn’t totally wasted. I managed to piss off some fruit-loop.” Divorce can never be good. No matter how happy one is after it. Just ask your children if they’d prefer you both remained together.

  22. dISCLAIMER: Not meant for people easily offended. Not intended to mock any society or praise another, be it eastern or western. Not intended to insult anybody, more so Rob who’s done so much for Yuvi, my friend from my country. I don’t have any idea about the circumstances that lead to his divorce and am simply making my opinion public because Rob asked for it. This is simply the third person view of things from Rob’s side and a first person perspective from mine. And I don’t want somebody to make Lifehacker-type comments to this comment that would force me to put a Rob-like blog post!

    Hey Rob,
    I like you and you’re a good guy, you didn’t do anything wrong by writing your comment which, in the way it is, is actually quite funny. And I agree that the guy who left the other comment was harsh. But you know what, I think that even I would have probably posted a similar comment, though not so harsh. I don’t think this is any matter related to just you, it’s something related to societies in general, where the divorce rates are so high and the people affected by them at any point in time are quite numerous. While divorce may seem like an easy way to solve a difficult problem,it isn’t the only way. I know of just a couple or so divorces from nearly several hundreds of couples I have met at various places till now in my life. I live in India. How come there aren’t that many divorcees here? While your comment may be funny to people not exposed to divorce as a regular event, it isn’t to those who are. Imagine that guy was the child of divorced parents. Or imagine that his/her parents had decided to divorce just today. When there are more people having divorce-related issues in their life, there’s more chance of them being sensitive to such issues. As such, I would say that Indians for example, though not exposed to it much, are less sensitive to it than Americans, for example, are where it’s relatively common. You were probably the trigger for the guy which made you write thus : “It’s interesting that I am suddenly the cause for divorce in America, AND that I am going to hell for it!” It’s one matter to divorce personally and to talk about it in public using it in general talk as if it were some anecdote or something. I think you should apologise to him/her. I actually hope you apologise. It would mean so much to such a person. Just think. Do you think Indian couples don’t have problems? Or why wasn’t divorce so common even in America during the 1950’s?
    I’m not saying the Indian society is insulated from it and won’t have to deal with it so go fend for yourself. What I am saying is that this is something that will definitely happen to every society. It happened to yours. It will happen to mine. And we must be ready for it with the right attitude.
    Please do apologise. I sincerely believe it would mean so much to the person who left the other comment assuming he/she wasn’t a crackpot.
    Sisir Koppaka


  1. […] 25th, 2007 Two very different viewpoints colluded on this page. I thought the conversation between Rob and me deserved some space on my blog for record’s […]